volonta:

Carly Rae Jepson - Call me maybe

this is terrifying

sounds like something cannibals would listen to as they dance around in a circle 

God fucking dammit Robbie just answer my goddamn text because every minute that goes by I think of what it would be like to date this other boy that much more. Today is not the day to ignore me for hours.

faguccino:

nintendoggystyle:

This photo speaks to me. I can’t even begin to describe the contrast between the nail and the balloon. To me, this amazing image represents suffering and courage throughout the world. Look into the balloon’s eyes. It is in tremendous pain. But it is still holding on. This is the true American dream.

Really? Because to me it represents the first time you experience butt sex.

My favorite color is “small potatoes”

senor-cactuar:

how about the international justice league of super acquaintances

expertcosmotips:

for a sensual new experience, gently ease a pregnant iguana into his urethra tail-first and coax it into laying its eggs once it is securely inside

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thisisnotmyfairytaleendingg:

The moment when you realize a child living in total poverty is more happy than you are. Money truly cannot buy happiness. I am in pursuit of that happiness.

Being poor and starving doesn’t lead to true happiness either- money has no effect on happiness, only your personality does.

badcgijosh:

marththebland:

superangst:

roypee:

zeaky:

vgly:

dumbfuckery:

I stole this kid’s neopets account and when I checked my email I find this
 

omg

breathing down your butt

the ‘kindly gloria’ bit makes me picture an old lady instead of a kid and i honestly like it much better this way

YOU STOLE A CHILD’S NEOPETS ACCOUNT WHAT IS FUCKING WRONG WITH YOU

uh yeah this isn’t funny this is mean

Wow what an exceptionally shitty person you are

Congratulations for exhibiting the unique brand of wit normally reserved for antagonists in John Hughes films

overcoatangel:

alethiometric:

spintowin:

scienceandrollerskates:

Today, I made some calming manatees, but most of them are the wrong size to go on the site.

Oh well. Would you like them?

Oh my god this is BEAUTIFUL

this is a good post and you should feel good

We all need more calming manatees in our lives

mileyhighrus:

ARE YOU READY TO JINGLE YOUR BELLS

phoenixpen:

The Bubblegum popsicle is one of the most horrifying things I’ve ever seen.

vvelvvet:

yepperoni:

do you guys remember that episodfe of the magic school bus where the class gets transformed into fish eggs and get fertilized with fish semen 

so calm as they get doused